In my (Ken’s) book Conformed to His Image, I list out the following exhortations (33 positive and 7 negative for a total of 40), with the following explanation:
In this world, we are part of a community of pilgrims who are traveling toward God, and we are meant to assist, nurture, and encourage one another along the way. Commitment to a local community of faith enhances personal growth by providing a corporate context for identity, involvement, and ministry. This commitment to mutual nurture and service is most clearly expressed in the New Testament reciprocal “one another” commands.1
The Exercise:
Read through this list and flag the commands that stick out to you. Which one (or two, or a few) do you need to work on in order to recalibrate your relationships? Consider posting those on your wall or bathroom mirror, or putting them into an alert/reminder on your phone. Whenever you see them, pray for God’s help in following through on His command.
Example: If you struggle with being critical of other people, especially in your speech, put Romans 14:19 (“Pursue what makes for peace and for mutual upbuilding”) and James 4:11 (“Do not speak against one another”) somewhere where you’ll see these two commands a few times a day—maybe in a place where you tend to find yourself making critical comments.
- Wash one another’s feet (John 13:14).
- Love one another (John 13:34).
- Be devoted to one another in brotherly love (Romans 12:10a).
- Give preference to one another in honor (Romans 12:10b).
- Be of the same mind toward one another (Romans 12:16; 15:5).
- Build up one another (Romans 14:19).
- Accept one another (Romans 15:7).
- Admonish one another (Romans 15:14).
- Greet one another (Romans 16:16; 1 Corinthians 16:20 ).
- Wait for one another (1 Corinthians 11:33).
- Have the same care for one another (1 Corinthians 12:25).
- Through love serve one another (Galatians 5:13).
- Bear one another’s burdens (Galatians 6:2).
- Show tolerance for one another (Ephesians 4:2).
- Be kind to one another (Ephesians 4:32a).
- Forgive one another (Ephesians 4:32b).
- Speak to one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs (Ephesians 5:19).
- Be subject to one another (Ephesians 5:21).
- Regard one another as more important than yourselves (Philippians 2:3).
- Teach and admonish one another (Colossians 3:16).
- Comfort one another (1 Thessalonians 4:18).
- Encourage one another (1 Thessalonians 5:11a; Hebrews 3:13).
- Build up one another (1 Thessalonians 5:11b).
- Live in peace with one another (1 Thessalonians 5:13).
- Seek after that which is good for one another (1 Thessalonians 5:15).
- Stimulate one another to love and good deeds (Hebrews 10:24).
- Confess your sins to one another (James 5:16a).
- Pray for one another (James 5:16b).
- Keep fervent in your love for one another (1 Peter 4:8).
- Be hospitable to one another (1 Peter 4:9).
- Use your gifts to serve one another (1 Peter 4:10).
- Clothe yourselves with humility toward one another (1 Peter 5:5).
- Do not judge one another (Romans 14:13).
- Do not bite and devour one another (Galatians 5:15).
- Do not become boastful, challenging one another (Galatians 5:26a).
- Do not envy one another (Galatians 5:26b).
- Do not lie to one another (Colossians 3:9).
- Do not speak against one another (James 4:11).
- Do not complain against one another (James 5:9).
[1] Kenneth Boa, Conformed to His Image: Biblical, Practical Approaches to Spiritual Formation, rev. ed.
(Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan Academic, 2020), 457–458.
